The holidays can be a great time to discuss family estate planning. Prepare for the unexpected by making sure that aging parents have up to date wills, and that key family members have a game plan in case of emergency.
Good afternoon everyone. Welcome to Pink Mic Legal Confessions. Happy holidays. To those of you that are watching right now, I actually have a very important topic I wanted to discuss. But first, let me introduce you to myself. My name is Attorney Stephanie Garces, owner of Garces Law Firm here in Palatine, and we are helping you prepare for the unexpected, and also helping you prepare for your legacy.
Today's topic is interesting because I feel like everyone can relate where we are spending these holidays with their family members. Hopefully you're seeing people that you don't usually see every point of the year. So it's nice to get everyone together and to talk through some of the things that are on our mind and perhaps we've been procrastinating about.
So, it's good for us to talk through some of those things. Today, I just wanted to talk about the holiday season. Holiday season is one of my favorite times of the year. I actually take my holidays very seriously. I actually always tell my staff that as well because I actually think it's the only time that you get to see family that you don't normally see.
You get to travel, you get to spend time with your family, et cetera, kids, whoever. But for many of us, this is the only time we get to see family members, specifically those that live far away perhaps are aging parents and grandparents, or aging siblings. The holiday also provides an excellent opportunity for us to discuss some of the things that we usually discuss to check-in with each other, specifically when it comes to putting together
an estate plan or getting some health updates, just updates about life. Like who's getting good grades and what's so and so doing for their career? How is your health? There's so many questions I think that we all ask each other just to get an idea of what exactly it is that we're all up to.
So, it can be challenging when you think about talking about these conversations, specifically when it talks about health and perhaps even in the event of someone getting ill or someone perhaps passing away. Those are always really tough conversations. To be honest, I think in today's world we wanna break the ice, but it also is tough because there's a lot of emotion around some of these topics.
And quite frankly, I think sometimes people may look at you funny if you're actually the one posing the question. I always get clients that get concerned that if they bring up something regarding a family member's health and whatnot, that there could be some sort of, I guess you could say, underlying motive, if you will, as to what exactly it is that you're asking about.
This is a funny topic to me because I feel like sometimes people will say, I don't wanna ask my grandparent this, or I don't wanna ask my parents this when I have other siblings in front of me. Because they might think, wow, you're really already thinking about those things and it's the holidays.
So it can be really tough to talk about some of these things. And so, one of the things I wanna dive into during Pink Mic Legal Confessions is this topic. How do you talk about updating your grandparents wills during Thanksgiving break, and perhaps they don't even have ones. We even discuss that.
But more so, in general, right? Part of being responsible parents and adults is having an emergency plan for your loved ones. I always say that those of you that don't have an estate plan, you're not really leaving a gift to your family. You're actually making it harder for the people that outlive you.
Whether that be your significant others, your spouse, your kids your living grandparents, et cetera. Even your pets, believe it or not, which you'll have to check out the other episode that I talked about state planning for pets, but it may not seem like a super significant thing. I know
a lot of my clients will say to me, it's on my to-do list. Haven't gotten to it, but I'm going to get on it. And at this point, they have thought about it obviously, but it may not seem super, super high in priority. But if there isn't much wealth in family and assets, you may also think it's not significant.
But if you watched Pink Mic Legal Confessions before, I always talk about the fact that everyone, regardless of your income, your background, your status, you should always consider having a will. So, that's why I say those i deas that these things are not important are false. They're not super rooted in fact and when it comes to the law.
And so, a will typically answers all the questions that you have regarding who would get what, and how do you avoid family fights? It also gives instructions to your family. Specifically, there is a way to put together an estate plan to actually stipulate as to what happens to you or what are your medical wishes if you become incapacitated.
If you become unresponsive or if someone passes away unexpectedly. If there's one thing that's for certain, I always say it's death and taxes. But luckily for me, I more specialize in the first. So that's typically what I mean. And so I think without a will and without really checking in on the will you created many moons ago, you might be doing it a disservice to your family
because having an estate plan and just letting it sit without checking is never a good idea. And I'll tell you why. When you think about the way that the law works, the law is always concerned about what do you have in place and does it encompass the current situation that you're in when you pass?
Well, the funny thing about this is that when you have an estate, that you've created when you were young, or perhaps you've created it ever since a change happened or before a change happened, whether that's you got married, you had more than one child, or a child. Perhaps you've broken up with your ex and they're no longer in there.
There's so many things. A lot of times too, people have passed away. Unfortunately, we know that our grandparents are aging, and so a lot of times one of them passes away before the other. That's really significant because many times I see it with a lot of clients, they feel stressed out thinking about the fact that they have to update their estate plan or look at some of the stuff that they have in order
if somebody passes away, especially their significant other or their adult children. Now, why is this important? Well, if you think about it, if you have a will that talks about something that's not really relevant, it has no weight, right? It has no significance. And so having an outdated will is not a good idea.
And really, I always tell people, think about it as if your things have to reflect what's actually happening. I would hate to say this and scare anybody, but a lot of times people will have beneficiaries, for example, in their paperwork that says, I'm giving this to my spouse. Well, if your spouse has passed away before you, or perhaps you're no longer with them, you may wanna update your estate plan and maybe some of your beneficiary information.
And so this happens a lot. I see a lot of people that have made wills back in the eighties and the nineties and actually even powers of attorney letters. Some of those have been outdated. There's been some updates in the law, and so there's always a good reason to revisit some of the estate plans that your family may have in place, especially when it comes to your grandparents and aging grandparents.
Family members and loved ones are always left trying to figure out, everything during a stressful time. And if your will is not updated or you don't even have one, you really are not setting them up for success. If anything, it's causing more confusion, which is never good. Also in today's episode, I'm going to be covering some of the tips of how to break the ice.
How to make light of traditionally a heavy topic, right? Let's get started a little bit more about that. The first tip I have is you wanna start the conversation. So try to find a casual location and time. You don't wanna do this at the dinner table. So if you all have watched movies in the past, whenever someone is eating dinner and there's a family gathering, it's not the best time to bring something up that would upset someone else, right?
Because then you ruin everyone's dinner. So I don't actually recommend doing this at a dinner table, especially where everyone is next to each other. They can hear conversations. But think about coffee, think about a place you can walk in and sit down and have some privacy and feel relaxed. Those are really good places to do this.
I see a lot of people talk with their grandparents, or parents, aging parents regarding this topic a lot in coffee shops. Local coffee shops, somewhere where it's not super, super loud, but it also allows for some privacy and really not in the presence of anyone that you know, which is good.
Also when you have a conversation with someone, understand that this is a really tough topic. Be very empathetic. I think sometimes individuals feel as though when they're getting asked the questions about their estate plan that maybe someone has a motive and someone is trying to get to the bottom of things before they pass.
And so, it is a little bit of a tough topic. Keep in mind too, we work with a lot of different individuals and many people come from different cultures. So you might have like a cultural barrier where they may not understand why you're asking why it's important here, especially in the United States compared to other places that people are from.
The laws are very different. So, make sure you lead with certain phrases such as, you're important to me, you're important to us. We wanna ensure that we know what to do if anything ever happens to you. You can also say that you don't have to do this immediately. A lot of people feel like if you create this conversation, you need to go make your appointment with your attorney like that night.
And a lot of times I think, I speak for myself, but also a lot of con consumers and clients, they don't want to feel the pressure of having to do this at that very second because to be honest, a lot of people don't ever have the options of thinking through things. So, find a time to discuss your wills and your wishes with your family.
You could also say that it would make them feel more prepared perhaps if you looked for the attorney or they get a recommendation. But the point is that you can always offer to guide them to give them the push that they need. But like I said, understanding this hard topic about estate planning is always a must, and you definitely wanna do it when the person is in good health.
As a lot of people will look to update their estate plan when their parents or grandparent is already in the hospital, and so you have to remember, it's really important to do this while they're healthy and well. Do not wait till the last minute because you're really up against some factors that may not allow us to finish the estate plan or do the estate plan.
The other thing I recommend is frame the conversation with a reason to talk about it. So what I mean by this is bring up a topic that's in the news, like the pandemic finally being over. Well, depends who you ask, right? Or other medical based discussions happening in the media. And so I think the pandemic is the greatest
topic because I think about the pandemic as a time where everybody was really uncertain about the outcome of our nation, but also particularly with people that already had predisposed conditions, medical conditions, that really allowed us to think about things really like in the immediate future.
And so talking about those things helps people remind them as to why it's important to talk about these items. Why do we think about state planning? Why do we wanna update what you have? Why don't we even wanna review it? We do review estate plans plenty of times to see if there's anything to update. Sometimes too,
following up with like, this is an excellent reminder for all of us to make sure that all your documents are up to date so that we know what to do if the inevitable happens, or sometimes it's not even about passing. A lot of times people have an accident. They go into a coma. They can't make their own decisions.
That's another reason to have an estate plan. It's not just when you pass away. So that's a good one. Another tip that I always recommend is engage key family members in a family fire drill. Now this is always a funny one because people are always saying, do people actually do this? It's not the kind that you run outside and you have to run for cover.
It's not that, but it's more of a legal fire drill where you can focus on a couple of things. For example who are the people that have to be notified between family members and professionals if something ever happens? Making sure you have all the contact information that it's up to date, it's documented.
Keep in mind too that I've noticed over time that some people will retire. Many attorneys, fellow attorneys, professionals are retiring or have retired since they did your estate plan. So find out about that if it's possible. Because it's never a bad idea to check if they're around. The other thing too is where are the legal documents, right?
That's part of the fire drill. I always tell individuals to make sure that they communicate with their family as to what is actually in the will. Right? But also where did you put it? Whether you put it at the bank or you put it, I've had people put it in the freezer. Yes. People put it in the freezer.
Their estate plans. I've seen estate plans in the TV stand. I can go on and on about all the places that I've seen estate plans, so just communicating about that and having access to where the will is at, financial statements, passwords, deeds to the property, title, insurance. Those things are so important.
And who has access to those, right? Who has access to passwords. Many times I always advise clients if it's possible, try to keep your passwords in a safe place, but still write them down. You know how many of us have passwords that we can't even remember we made two days ago? I know I'm guilty of that, but it's something that you may wanna consider putting with your batch of papers to make sure that there's direction, that there is access to some of your things.
The other thing, part of the fire that's really important is the how, right? What are each parent's wishes and are they notarized and legally put into this world and outlined accordingly? Now, there's so many different wishes for every person. Everyone is different, but when was the last time you updated your will?
That is something that I ask every client. You'd be surprised how many people will have the same will from 17, 20 years ago and haven't really updated it since. So it's just something to keep in mind and when you're talking with your family members, Now something else I'd like to discuss is how often should you be revisiting this? Can you come up with a sort of a pseudo agreement to have your age grandparents or parents look at this?
Now I usually say around every annual medical exam or specifically around the holidays or even if there's a medical scare. There's so many different reasons why you can look at your estate plan just to make sure it says what you want and it doesn't take more than a couple minutes to really just look into some of the details there.
At least we can even look at it ourselves to make sure that it says what you want it to say. Keep in mind too, you have to make sure that your grandparent or parent has the estate plan that is specific to Illinois law if they live here, or if they got it online it's in compliance with what's already out there.
Now I always tell you that you have to go with an attorney to make sure you get a customized will, but still there's wills that are invalid and I take a look at them and the client has thought they were invalid this whole time. So those are things that you wanna consider. Now lastly, remember what the lawyer's role is in all this.
So I've covered this a couple of times through Pink Mic Legal Confessions, but I always like to remind clients I'm here with you throughout this process to help your families, to help yourself, to guide you through the planning process and long after someone has passed away. So to help families protect their wealth, to help their assets be protected, to transfer them, establishing the appropriate trust to putting stuff really titled in the correct way so that the corresponding person is able to get access to that. Really preserve the legacy of the person is really what we do.
And so, any unexpected scenarios we try to encounter by outlining them, in the event that the inevitable does happen. So insurance that your documents that you're compliant are always a plus. Local state laws are always changing. There's rules and regulations sometimes that are passed
that change anything from a power of attorney to a state plan. Same thing with real estate. A lot of laws and things have changed with real estate. A lot of times people will ask me, can I put this in a trust? Can I put this in an llc? Should I do something else? We do a lot of real estate laws, so we can certainly advise you depending on what your goals are.
But it's always a good idea to have someone in your corner to help you with this because this is something where not every attorney handles all of this other stuff. There's plenty of people that will do part of your estate plan, but when you're looking at your portfolio or your grandparents, you have to make sure that, have we accounted for anything that didn't exist at the time
they created the original will to now? So some attorneys know that there's a will that has to be created and this person may only have assets at the time that encompassed the will, which is fine. But if your grandparent or something has changed over time, they've gone more properties, or perhaps they've sold off properties, et cetera, maybe they became snowbirds.
We're here to support your family. And so, those are different things that come up a lot of times. And we usually wanna make sure that your documents reflect whether there's any sort of changes in that. And so, we also designate, help designate some of the individuals that your family member would want with regards to the administrative process of their estate.
And so all of that is covered typically in an estate plan. It can be also covered with estate planning and real estate combination of the two because, estate planning is for all of the assets, not just money, not just real estate. So I wanna pause really quickly for those of you that are just joining me.
My name is attorney Stephanie Garces Donat. I'm the founding attorney here at Garces Law Firm. In Palatine, we help individuals and couples secure their legacy, but also prepare for the unexpected. Especially now during the holidays where we're showing a little bit more of the conversational pieces that should be taking place during these holidays.
So you can always watch your Facebook page for any of the videos I've put on previous to this, but a lot of them cover different topics, so feel free to watch it there anytime. Today I'm covering a really important topic that's very increasingly popular. How to talk to your grandparents about updating their will, and especially during Thanksgiving break. Now we welcome you always to join us here on Tuesdays
at one o'clock central time to look at Pink Mic Legal Confessions to see what we're covering. We may have a guest one week, we may not have a guest another week, but we usually share tips and guidances to everyone that's watching free of charge to your parents, to your guardians, et cetera. So now I know a lot of you have a lot of questions, so I like to make sure that we address some of those here, especially some of the frequently asked questions.
So one of the ones that I get a lot is what can I do if my parents avoid the conversation? Well, that is a great question because I think a lot of parents avoid the conversation. Who wants to think about these things? Not everybody. You might think, oh, everyone's gonna be so open and willing to discuss,
and I will tell you, it's a generational thing. So, parents may not necessarily wanna discuss this, but it's okay. Like I said before, having a time, maybe a separate time to talk about it if they don't feel comfortable during Thanksgiving holiday to talk about it is a good idea. Setting up an appointment saying, Hey, when are you available?
Maybe you come by their place, going somewhere private. And also just expressing some of the tips I told you earlier is like being empathetic. You certainly don't wanna come off aggressive, you don't wanna come off as having this underlying motive, as to I want everything to go to me.
You definitely don't wanna put it off. I think it's easy for everyone to avoid, but you don't necessarily wanna avoid it if you know it's the inevitable, especially if there's been issues in the past. A lot of our parents have this thought that, oh, I'll do it later. I'm busy right now.
And so make sure you mention it to them because I think avoiding the conversation is natural. But I also think it opens the door to putting together something like an appointment with them. They can consult with you and make an appointment with us. There's so many steps you can take to avoid the conversation and try not to take it personal. A lot of times, I think parents in general don't want their kids to think about what would happen if they passed.
So sometimes it's more of an emotional tactic more so than a, I don't wanna talk to you type of tactic, so just something to keep in mind when it comes to that. Another thing that we discuss a lot is, do you help clients get legal power of attorney when parents cannot make their own decisions?
And yes, we definitely do. Having healthcare directives is so important and I think this is something that across the board, regardless of your background, your income, what you have and don't have, I think we all have health. So we can all agree on that, and protecting that health and allowing us to create the appropriate powers of attorney letters so that you can have a say so to speak in who makes your medical decisions is extremely powerful.
And so those documents are definitely ones we prepare in case your parents cannot make their own decisions. Absolutely. Another question that I get is, can estate planning be done after someone gets sick? This is a great question because the answer is, it depends. Now when someone is sick, it doesn't actually mean they've lost their capacity to think for themselves.
And so if that's the case and they have what's called legal competency, meaning they can make thorough decisions, then sure, we could certainly do the estate plan. That isn't a problem. What I said to you earlier was about the fact that a lot of people wait till the last minute to do an estate plan.
And I think when someone gets sick and they lose consciousness, they cannot make their own decisions, it's a lot harder for them to enter into estate planning documents. There's an ethical duty that we have as attorneys to actually do estate planning if the person has competency. And so the competency is in question sometimes if someone is sick and can't make their own decisions.
So that really poses a challenge to the family and to us. And so most times I think this answer is, it depends, and you certainly don't wanna wait until someone gets sick to do it. The other question is, can you meet with our family over Zoom or do we have to come in? Well, luckily we do offer virtual, but also phone conferences if you don't wanna come in, if you aren't able to come in.
We are I think all in agreement here where most people will say, Hey, I know what Zoom is. I use it every day. So we certainly use it and I enjoy it, especially when there's a client that may not be able to make it, whether it's their schedule or their health issues that they can't make it to our office.
We certainly offer virtual consultations and it's great because you can be in your pajamas, you can be with a family member if you wanted to be with thembecause you feel more comfortable. We do offer consultations in Spanish and in English, so I like to make sure everyone knows that because we are fully bilingual here, so we're able to help people in both languages with Zoom.
The other thing that I get a lot of questions about is how much money does a family have to necessitate data trust? Now, this is a really great question. I'll give you the answer as to the blanket statement. The blanket rule. Usually if Illinois says you as an individual when you pass, have assets that are over a hundred thousand,
then at that point, having a trust is a great idea because it does avoid not only some tax issues that you could come across, but also issues with probates and avoiding that. And so usually I say a hundred thousand. And this does include, by the way, insurance, life insurance specifically. It includes the home, the value of the home.
A lot of people will say, I only have X amount in my bank, but depending on what you have as a whole, we do examine your financials when we come and do a consultation, a lot of times I go through, okay, what is it that you own here? Do you own things in other states? Do you own a home? Are you renting?
Those are all questions that are relevant as to whether or not you will need a trust. And we never recommend a trust if it's not something that is needed. There is other alternatives in the event your assets are under a hundred thousand. You should still come and see us because we can still do a proper estate plan that doesn't require a trust.
So that is a great question because I feel like everyone has that question for us and what counts as assets is very tricky. So it's important for you to ask us that question when you come. The other thing I was gonna mention is with regards to our consultations, everyone asks us how much is our consultation?
Well, we've been doing free consultations for almost everybody, and if there's an issue with regards to what we are charging for a consultation. A lot of times people want us to review things. Sometimes we will charge additional if we're reviewing documents, but if it's just an initial consultation, it is free.
So feel free to book your consultation via text or phone anytime. Now, where do you contact me? You have my information always at the bottom of the lives here. But you have our phone number that's always posted as a banner at the bottom. And there's also on Facebook, there is our phone number and our contact info.
Same with Google. I always tell people, check out our Google reviews please, because I am so, so proud of those. Luckily, our clients are nice enough to leave reviews and at their own will. We do not pay for those reviews. So it's just something to keep in mind. But if you wanna look us up, you have our number. You can always text us as well if you don't feel like calling and we can set something up with you.
So thank you all that are watching. Thank you always for watching our Pink Mic Legal Confessions. I think this is a great topic again, how to talk to your grandparents about updating their will during the Thanksgiving break. And as always, thank you to all the viewers. If you need anything, have any questions, feel free to reach out to us and always, it's very great for everyone to continue sharing our videos.
Follow us so you can see what we're doing here. We're always thinking of unique topics, a cover that will be relevant to you or someone that you know. So I invite you here to join us next week, Pink Mic Legal Confessions, Tuesdays at one o'clock in the same place. And please share the recording and have a wonderful Thanksgiving and holiday and we'll see you soon.
Take care everyone. Bye.